I’ll begin my story with a mantra that I have always held dear, “Clarify in your mind what it is that you want; hold it in your heart and never let go until you have it.” I believe that faith is very important, but focused persistence is key to achieving what you want in life — in my case, fertility.
I am the second oldest of four girls. I grew up in a happy, close-knit family. I believed in the fairytale and was sure that I would fall in love, get married and have a family of my own someday.
At 18, I was having increasingly painful menstrual cramps. The diagnosis ended up being endometriosis and my doctor’s suggestion to me was to “get pregnant as soon as possible because you may end up infertile.” I was shocked at the suggestion to get pregnant when I had no boyfriend or husband, and had just started college.
So, I hoped he’d be wrong and went on with my life. During the next six years, my cramps grew more and more painful and the drugs I was given to handle the pain were stronger and stronger.
I met my husband in college and we got married when I was 24. We planned on starting our family right away, so I never took birth control. After two years of no pregnancy, we consulted a fertility specialist.
We tried six rounds of Clomid and double doses of Clomid with two artificial inseminations, with no success. We were discouraged and heart broken. My husband never thought it would be that difficult to get pregnant. I felt so sad and humiliated, as if I were less of a woman because my body wouldn’t “produce” as it should.
Every time someone got pregnant, I would be filled with conflicting emotions. My sister already had two sons and my friends and sisters-in-law had children too. I was happy for them and excited about the babies, but also suffered terribly with bouts of depression over my inadequacy and empty nest. At times I felt extremely angry at pregnant women and mothers with their children. Other times, I would tell people that I had no desire to be burdened by babies, which was a defense mechanism, I guess.
I then underwent laparoscopic surgery and other invasive procedures to clear the endometriosis.
Well-meaning people were always quick to give their advice to help me. This advice ranged from standing on my head, to acupuncture, herbal remedies, adopting a baby so that I’d miraculously become pregnant and the old favorite, “Just relax and don’t think about it, and POOF — you’ll be pregnant before you know it!” How could I NOT think about it when with each passing menstrual cycle, there was a constant reminder? I would think to myself, “How can I relax when I want it so much and am reminded of it everyday?”
After that, we moved to Arizona and I was referred to a well known fertility specialist. After meeting with him and coming up with a plan of action, I was so renewed with hope!
I had an HSG and another laparoscopy, and underwent two failed IUIs with Clomid. My husband and I disliked how “un-romantic” and clinical this process was. And stressful!
I changed specialists three more times, and had a laparotomy that cleared 80% of the endometriosis but left scarring. We then did in vitro fertilization (IVF) with ICSI.
After that failed, we were told that I should consider donor eggs since my FSH level was beginning to get high and I was not a good candidate to retry IVF. A second specialist confirmed this diagnosis as well.
We were heartbroken. I became really depressed and underwent psychiatric therapy for six months. I was told to “have faith” by my family and I really WANTED to continue to have faith but it was hard when “specialists” were telling me there was no reason to feel hopeful.
During this time, I heard of Clear Passage Physical Therapy and discussed it as an option with my doctor. He discouraged me from pursuing it since his method was (according to him) the only proven successful option. (This may have been before they published any of their studies — or else he hadn’t read them.)
After about six months in therapy for my depression, I felt better again. During a check-up with my primary care physician, I told her that I was feeling mentally better again and wanted to continue looking for options to get pregnant. She gave me a magazine containing various fertility methods, and in it, I read an article on Clear Passage.
I felt like it was a sign, and that I should pursue it since it was the second time I came across it. So, I looked into it, called the office and felt really positive by what I was presented with, by the friendly, caring, and knowledgeable staff.
I went to their clinic for four hours of therapy per day for five days. I arrived on a Sunday and had my sister stay overnight with me. We went to Disneyland on Sunday to kick off this exciting week and had so much fun! Then, I’d take a walk on the beach and meditate every morning before attending therapy.
My experience with Clear Passage was extremely positive. Not only was my endometriosis infertility addressed, but my therapist gave me more information and knowledge about my body and how it works than I could have ever hoped to know.
I returned home in high spirits, feeling healthier, renewed and relaxed. I started taking my basal temperature every morning with my next cycle and we tried once again to conceive via “the natural method.”
Two weeks later, I was feeling “off.” I had purchased some pregnancy tests since we would be “trying” for the next six months. Lo and behold — the test was positive!! I just stood there looking at myself in my bathroom mirror, not believing and yet believing that it had finally happened to me! And within two weeks of my therapy!
I am crying again now, as I remember this awesome moment. I had a wonderful, healthy pregnancy and our daughter, Mia Bella, is now 22 months old and the light of our lives.
In the end, it took 10 years before I got pregnant — too bad I didn’t know about Clear Passage sooner!
Whenever someone is wishing for a miracle, I always tell them my story, refer them to Clear Passage and tell them to be persistent and patient, as it can pay off.